Watch out, this blog is for big girls and boys only.

There are times when I want to scream, "Just shut the fuck up!" But I can't. Fuck is not a word a nice Christian girl uses. And I am a nice Christian girl, aren't I?

I'd like it very much if I had no one to answer to, but the truth of the matter is, a Higher Power does exist (whatever that means), and there are many things beyond the various definitions for the word fuck that truly matter in this life.

I do believe in a God who wants more from me. So I keep my mouth shut. And I try not to use words like fuck.

Not that having a relationship with God is about watching my mouth. It's definitely not about that. It's about something else.

It's about truth and finding truth in every aspect of my life. God is truth and He is reality and He is all around me.

I like to write. That is the truth. God is in that.

My dad is wearing a Cubs hat. He loves the Cubs. That is the truth. Supporting a team and loving the game can be a deeply spiritual experience. I believe God is in that.

The sky is blue and the grass is green and the sun is shining. That is the truth. Breathing in fresh air and basking in the warm rays of the sun ignites something deeply spiritual. God is in that, too.

Don't hear me wrong; this is not what I'm saying. God is not my pen or my journal. He is not baseball, the Cubs, or a hat. I don't think he involves himself in sports on a daily basis. He is not the sky or the grass or the sun. These are all things he has created or inspired to be made or gifted us with skills and talents to invent and orchestrate. We live and move in a world that he has created, and he has created for us to enjoy.

So while I must behave like someone who loves God, I also must enjoy and savor the things this earth offers. Enjoying my life is an act of worship. My life is enriched by God and the things He has given me and placed around me.

I think, then, that it is far worse to neglect and ignore the many things this life does have to offer than it is to say fuck. What's in a word anyway?

I say this not to justify saying fuck, but to demonstrate that maybe we spend too much time worrying about trivial things such as word choice when we should be experiencing God, truth, and reality in their full, rich glory every waking moment of our short, finite lives.

You can disagree if you want; you have that right. But I would rather live a rich life on the edge than sulk in the shadows, scowling at all the people who are actually enjoying their lives.

I have found that it is quite possible and extremely liberating to live on the edge, within God's sovereign control. It's a titillating paradox, isn't it? Under God's control, yet so free and so dangerous? Yes, it's confusing, but we aren't meant to comprehend the ways of God.

Jesus (always) is a perfect example. In his day, he was a CRAZY mofo. He stood up and spoke out against the government officials and the religious leaders. He said, you have heard this, but I tell you this. He made history with the things he said and did that were against the grain. He died because of it, and there's nothing less dangerous than that.

Yet throughout it all, he was under God's sovereign hand. God willed him to be what society considered to be ridiculous.

I'm aware there's a fine line between crazy and stupid, so we have to watch out for that.

Be crazy, live on the edge, embrace your life, glorify God, and enjoy the many blessings of an enriched life.

There is no need to fear death. Jesus conquered it, and I shall live forevermore.

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